Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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