Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize