I want to stick my p in your. b.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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