we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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