Say something about gay babies.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
