well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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