If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Vodka?
Forever.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
