I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
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