I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
i think i have two assholes
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Randomize