I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Randomize
