Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
