That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Randomize
