I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
