So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Randomize
