i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
