then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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