We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Randomize
