do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
