i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
