I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
the day after is always just damage control
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize