Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Randomize