apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
