i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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