is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
