There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
