Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize