I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize