escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
