We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Randomize
