he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
