I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
just tell him i said nine months
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
