If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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