just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
