He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize
