I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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