you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
