Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
be right there i have to get my cape
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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