i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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