Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
only you would photoshop your dick
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize