If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
