I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
