Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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