i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
