ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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