no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
