Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
