yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
