Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
