Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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