guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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