Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize