I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
