Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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