Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
